Defining Success

Ever receive a title or award that haunts you? I have one of those from high school. I was voted "Most Likely to Succeed" my senior year. Even at the time I thought this was NOT a good thing. It made me feel uneasy and pressured. In reality, I'm pretty sure Jennifer Royston got the most votes but since we were only allowed to win one, thus the second place finisher appears to "win". As life and years have rolled by, I know that by the culture's standards, my success was mediocre at best. Life happens. Wanting to become a doctor had given way to choosing to become a nurse so I could spend time with my growing family. No regrets really. Being a nurse was beyond rewarding.

Back in August 2005, when Chuck didn’t know if I was going to make it, he literally began my funeral planning in the plane as he flew to the hospital I had been airlifted to in Nebraska. He even started to write my eulogy. When he told me about it later, I wanted to see what he wrote. What I saw was just how distraught he was and what I didn’t see was anything of any real significance. I admit, I was somewhat disappointed. I wanted to see something there that told me my life had mattered. At that time, I was quite distraught because, in my mind, my life was over. I would live but not really to be able to do any good and surely not be able to impact anyone's life for good. I'd had my chance and blown it.


So, how would you define success? Is it having enough money not to be worried about your wants or needs? Is it your kid being the best at whatever he or she is trying to conquer at this time? Is it getting good grades or having the big house? When you look back at your life, will it have had any significance to those you come in contact with everyday? How many people who have it all by the world's standards are miserable and have no time for their families or to enjoy life?

Jesus wanted us to not confuse success with significance…

Luke 9:25: What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?

Success is about productivity, acquiring things to impress others and climbing the ladder.

Significance is about impacting others for good and for God. In this, peace and strength are found through a real intentional relationship with Christ.

Adversity has taught me how possible it is that today could be my last day to make a difference. To me, Christian success is bringing glory to Him through being an extension of his love and grace and by using my struggles to help others through theirs. By believing that he has equipped me for this, I can live out his will for my life.

Phillipians 4:13: "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."





"God is always trying to give us good things but our hands are too full to receive it."- Augustine

Missing Mom

Yesterday I went to the first week of Spring semester of our Women's bible study. We're digging into Esther with Beth Moore and I cannot wait to get started! On our tables were baskets with questions in them. We each picked a question to answer so those at the table could get to know us better.

My question was "Who influenced you the most when you were young?" Emotion began to well up. Easy to answer but yet I find myself trying so desperately to hold on to my memory of her. It's been so long since I saw her last, since I heard her voice. It is, of course, my mom.

I lost her 21 years ago on January 1st. I can still remember that night, the call, running over in my maternity warm-ups with bare feet, seeing the paramedics doing CPR on her body that was so devastated by colon cancer. I remember asking them to stop, their faces, it was just so surreal....and sad...and wrong! I was 24 and pregnant with my daughter. I remember picking out the casket, the flowers, the way the icicles hung on a particularly beautiful wreath at the graveside. I still miss her and long to remember her because she was a great woman..........a woman I would have liked to introduce to my daughter.

So, I thought of some things I loved about her that I wanted to share with my kids and my friends. Here's a very short list of things that come to mind:

1) She looked great in yellow! I mean, who looks great in yellow, not many people!
2) She could rub the bottom of her feet together, her size 9 1/2 narrow feet, I mean, who can do that!! Way cool!
3) She always had these long zip up robes on in which she always had Kleenexes. Honestly, after she was gone, we found Kleenexes in all her pockets!! When I was little, I hated when she would spit on them to clean my face! Who the heck taught her that! Probably Grandmother Naff!
4) She was happy and content! Though she graduated from Louisiana Tech in, I think, 1947, with a teaching degree, she quit teaching to raise her kiddos then went back to teaching kindergarten when I went to kindergarten at Shiloh Terrace in Dallas, Texas
5) She doted on my dad almost nauseatingly and picked out his tie each morning. He kissed her goodbye as he yelled "It's gonna be a good day!" and jetted out the door like Tigger on Ritalin!
6) She loved to entertain friends, missionaries, young married couples, her kids and grand kids!
7) She was gentle and kind and beloved by many and I, honestly, never remember her saying anything ugly about anyone. I wish my kids could say that!!
8) She hit me with a fly swatter once! In the kitchen...by the oven and I'm still scarred!
9) She spent 60 hours working on my bridal veil, applying pearls by hand with love...
10) She skipped her last chemotherapy treatment so she would feel good for my wedding...

She taught me to cook and sew but most importantly, she taught me not with her words but with her life, what being Christ-like was all about. It took me many years after her death to get it, but I'm finally making a bit of progress!!


I could continue but won't. She certainly wasn't perfect, but she was humble. She had a sweet spirit about her. I only had her for 24 years but I am beyond thankful for the time I had. Each of us has only a small window of opportunity to influence others and love them as Christ loves us. She made a lasting impression on me not because she was the head of the PTA or because she ran a fortune 500 company. She simply embraced the highest calling of all, that of a wife and mother! She loved me, warts and all, unconditionally.

Thanks Mom! Can't wait to give you a hug!






Colossians 3:12- Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

Inexpressible Joy

I don't know what's gotten into me.......

Well, actually I do but it's not a what but a "Who". It is THE promised Christ, it is Jesus. I'm pumped as I look over who wants to memorize the word of God with me. We all have something in common, we want MORE of Him. We've tasted the joy that comes from knowing the true character of God, the freedom there is in living in His grace and we realize that there is life-giving power in His word.

These realizations are gifts for which we must be so grateful. We are eager to learn, not to become knowledgeable, but to become transformed...not to become pious or superior but to become humble and loved, always ready to share his love with others. God is just so amazing!

So we'll start February 1st on this. I'll post here but also will email you. I am reminded how many of you are not comfortable with commenting on the site. No worries. I'll be glad to email you and this will keep me on schedule. Organizing life is not a strong suit of mine so this will get my on my toes.

Thank you for doing this! If you haven't emailed me or commented below but want to join us please do! I'll be posting memorization tips here shortly as well as comments from emails to encourage one another on.

Who's up for the challenge to date?


1. Carol, my sister, Hutchins, TX
2. Amy, my beloved friend, Canton, MS
3. Angela,, Brandon, MS, Amy's sister, special needs mom, in ministry with hubby, fellow blogger, Remember Who You Are
4. Bobby,Clinton, MS, high school friend,
5. Lisa, Georgia, high school friend and fellow facebook addict, mom of many
6. Jennifer, Argyle, TX, young mom of 3.5 kids and new friend from church
7. Julie, Sacramento, CA, UC Davis co-worker and mom of sweet baby girl
8. Sarah, Laporte, TX, blogger and mom, God Isn't Finished with us Yet
9. Jim, Nashville, TN, high school friend and associate pastor, develops Lifeway studies
MORE: 1/14/08
10. Margaret, my ma-in-law and friend, Clinton, MS
11. Robin, high school friend, Clinton, MS
12. Julie R., high school friend, Monticello, MS
13. Eva H., high school friend, Raymond, MS

Several others are praying about joining up. Praying for all of you! Be thinking of verses applicable to current life challenges or just pick a psalm to memorize verse by verse or just use mine! Have a blessed day!


1 Peter 1:6-9: 6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9 for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

Romans 15:13- May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Been thinkin....

So how's 2009 going so far? I've been thinkin' about this blog thing again, what purpose it serves, if any, whether or not to continue to post, etc. It's been good for me and I'm learning so much but, at the same time, I want to use my time wisely and more importantly, I want you to be reading things that worth reading.

I have to tell you, I have been completely blown away by bloggers. I don't really have a blogroll to speak of because there are too many GREAT ones out there, how do you choose? You could literally sit all day reading them. I am so thankful that I wasn't aware of the talent out there or I would have NEVER started this.

What I do know is that I have been through something horrific and yet came out changed by His amazing grace. Now I cannot even imagine my life without having lived through it. I just want to tell everyone how God can pull you through anything! It's a strange phenomenon how having your proverbial rug pulled out can transform your life for the better. I often tell people that had I known what would happen, I might have sought to end it all to keep from enduring the challenges ahead of me.

One of the many things that "hit" me as I laid completely still in that hospital bed is that when I needed the words of God to meditate on, I couldn't bring them to my mind. All those years in church and bible study and nothing, not ta, zip....my mind was blank and I was overcome with fear. All I had was a framed scripture that a dear nurse friend at UC Davis, Ruthie, brought me from Jeremiah 17:14 that read "Heal me, Lord, and I will be healed, Save me, lord and I will be saved for you are the one that I praise." Holding a bible wasn't an option for me. Sadly, the resident student priest knew less than I did but I did enjoy talking with him.

All that said, I've been wanting to memorize scripture. I started with Challies.com and have now signed up with Beth Moore's blog to memorize a verse every two weeks. They have already had 3000 people sign up!! However, what I'd really like to do is to memorize with friends that I know through this blog, through life or my email buddies.

Are you Game?

What I'm thinking is we'll start on the February 1st. This just happens to be my 45th birthday and I can think of no greater gift than my friend's growing in their knowledge of the word of God. And, by then, all your other resolutions will be history and you'll need a fresh start!! LOL.

On February 1st, I'll post the verse I'm memorizing and, in the comments section, you post your selection or just feel free to use mine. We'll do this on the 1st and the 15th of each month. If you're like me, you have favorite scripture promises but have no idea where they are in the bible. Memorizing will give us the tools we need to encourage others and assurance in our own walk as well. Let's try committing to 3 months and then we'll see how it's going. I'll post some tips on memorizing to help us as well.

So, if your game, post your name and city below and your email addy if you want me to remind you.

If this seems too daunting, remember that God doesn't call the equipped, he equips the called! Trust Him and let Him amaze you through His word.

Praying for you friend!



Hebrews 4:12 For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires

2 Timothy 3:16-17: All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17 so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

Reflections on 2008

As I sit admiring the last sunrise of 2008, it's hard to grasp that another year has gone by. If you look back on my calendar you'd find me quite a bore. The year consisted of doctor visits and bible study, playing with dogs and my newly found hobby of blogging. I've spent much time alone with an awesome God in prayer and study. I've read some great books and found some wonderful christian friends. I've watched my baby girl blossom, my baby boy hit bottom and my oldest continue to seek. In it all, I've had more peace than ever before in my life despite physical difficulties and life's disappointments.

Why is it I am more at peace than ever before in my life? I can only speculate that my faith has grown exponentially through the tremendous adversity I have faced. Seeing clearly now, God has used those things I couldn't bear as opportunities for the strength of Christ to kick in as He becomes the bearer of my load. Adversity becomes a transforming gift from God. I don't understand it, but I am keenly aware of Romans 8 in my life:


Romans 8:28-And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. 29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.

31 What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written:

"For your sake we face death all day long;
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered."

37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Praying that you will experience Him this year and have a blessed 2009!

Father God, I thank you for those reading this entry. May their lives be blessed with your presence this year, may their hearts be drawn to you and your steadfast love. May their eyes be opened to your will for their lives and may they be used to spread your message of redemption. Give them a hunger for your word and protect them from the evil one who seeks to destroy and mislead. May we be diligent to impact others lives for your good. Strengthen them when adversity comes, Lord, that you may be glorified. I thank you, Lord, for your amazing grace. May we never take it for granted! Amen.